Keys to success

Here are some basic ideas to get you started:

1) Make peace with the fact that you enjoy sex. Also, make peace with the fact that other people want sex too.

Here's the thing: you probably make too big of a deal about sex. You either push waaaay too hard, or you pretend that you're flat in the front like Ken. So basically you act like a frat boy at a kegger or like a total prude. Both people are pretty annoying to the majority of people.

Here's a good exercise for either type of person. When you meet someone you like sexually, talk to them normally, and don't talk about sex at all directly. BUT picture them laying in bed fantasizing about having sex with you. You'll be surprised how much more comfortable you become, and how you subtly communicate that you're interested.

2) No one likes your problems

Don't talk about your ex, your boss, your friend who screwed you over, your debt, your parents being jerks, etc. Sure, we all need to talk sometimes, and that's fine by me. But that's what you have best friends for. And really, even with them you should limit your talking about problems constantly. Sometimes you have to just take it on the chin and deal with it yourself. Man up.

3) Don't give advice

This is especially big for men. Even if your friends are losers, don't treat them like losers. Only parents give advice without being asked directly. Unless someone specifically says to you "Hey, I need your advice on this", don't give advice. Listen, and then just end with something like "hey, I have faith in you, you can work this out." Don't treat your friends like idiots. Show some faith in them.

4) Make peace with the fact that not everyone will want to have sex with you.

I'm sorry to say this, but love is a numbers game. You're going to have to burn through some people it doesn't work out with. Don't take it personally. It's a statement of incompatibility, not a statement that you're flawed. Unless you are flawed, but you're going to have to learn to figure that out on your own. I'm just a dude on a blog.

5) People can handle honesty

That comes with the caveat that it's not always the time to tell the truth. Also, keep in mind "handling the truth" and "appreciating the truth" are different things. But being genuine is really your best ally in this world (next to being trustworthy).

6) Assume any information given to you is private and secret

Being trustworthy is super important. I can not stress this enough. This will get you laid, promoted, hired, anything. If you can't keep things to yourself, that's probably a sign that you need attention or that you need to feel better by pointing out other people's flaws. Running your mouth is a cancer. Be trustworthy.


More to come....